The Secret

Today is my 18th anniversary with the pilot.  Anytime I tell people how long we've been married inevitably I get asked "What's your secret?" I've given different answers to this question, one being separate bathrooms, another being laughter. But there truly is one answer which I will share at the end of this. I don't ever give people advice on their relationships because I truly feel that every relationship is unique. I just know what has worked for us. Early on I learned to not say things I will regret. I believe that their are  certain things you can't take back. I may have to calm down first before I talk about why I'm upset but I'd rather do that than say something hurtful. I've joked with the pilot that at times when I'm mad I would say "So when is your next trip? And when can I drop you off at the airport". Its funny if I'm joking but not if I'm serious. I still tell the pilot thank you for things I appreciate. He took my car the other day to wash it and buy me flowers. When he cooks dinner, I tell him thank you. I want him to know that I am thankful for those thoughtful gestures.  Every time we talk on the phone before we hang up we say "love you". The days he is on a trip we talk everyday and text. I don't ever feel like he is too far away. We got married at a very young age (19 & 20) and really we were still teenagers. Early on it was a lot of learning about each other and growing up. I love that we grew up together and built our lives to what it is today. He is my best friend and when I said I do I knew we had become one. When I thought about what the real secret was to our happy marriage the answer is respect. (And a hot husband ;-)